Greetings my fellow kiwis. I do hope everyone's eating right and working out those bodies for the abs for summer program, with everyone jumping on the bandwagon that is atkins, we will definitely have washboard abs in no time.
Some tips for the uninitiated who want to get ripped
1) Drink lots of water
2) Pee a lot ( i think 1 and 2 go hand in hand)
3) Eat your greens
4) Better yet, just dont eat
5) And the number one tip to lose weight, drop the carbs. Remember Jeremy's maxim, carbs are bad, protein is good.
Anyways, apparently our church paid quite a bit of money for the John maxwell leadership conference - MAXIMUM Impact. I do urge everyone to go. I like to think of it as 25 dollars spent on lunch, and you get a whole day's worth of speaking by really good speakers ( the writer notes the redundant sentence but failed to come up with better words). According to a source, conferences like these usually cost about 180 to 200 dollars. And these people are literally as famous as they sound. Except maybe not as famous as luminaries like Ronald Macdonald and Colonel Sanders of KFC fame. So if you're interested, do seek out the table outside church on sunday where very beautiful people will be waiting to sign you up. Of course, the organizers are thinking of having an after party, which will probably be at murdoch lecture theatre at 5.
And now for the serious matter of refreshments. This week, our theme will be food that you can cook, Already, thousands are marveling at the originality of the theme. Yes, you read it right the first time, its food you can cook. Remember friends, bring some food, if not we will go hungry. Aim to feed a small nation on friday, as eunice wong will be breaking fast. (attm: jiali, this does not include your uber salty mash potato). And for all you tools who didnt click attending for merdeka day, it is on. Please show your support for the glorious nation of Malaysia. As always, there will be some "losers" who play badminton on sunday so you can join them (at 530pm) or tennis with the cooler kids (330pm) and then after basking in their loser aura, go to eunice's house, shower, and eat food while we sing favorites such as dayung sampan and we love zimbaweeeeee.
Ok peace kiwis, im out
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